The Oscars Ozempic parade is upon us

T Spritz Esq receiving his 2025 Oscar for Best Adaptive Screenplay recently commented, "I look like a f-cking Manatee in that photo. This year, I may not win any awards but I will be thinner than all those drugged up bitches".

Spritzler's publicist later apologized for the writer's offensive comments saying "he hadn't easten in a few days and was feeling light headed at the time".

The Oscars Ozempic parade is upon us — but is anyone brave enough to tell these sickly stars how they really look?

By Kirsten Fleming, NY Post

Published March 13, 2026, 6:00 a.m. ET

On Sunday, awards season will conclude with the Oscars and a parade of shockingly skeletal Ozempified women in expensive custom designer gowns.

Their faces will have been pulled tight like a hotel bed sheet, and their lower cheeks carefully vacuumed out. It’s the new celebrity look: thin and thinner.

Faces are derivative and barely resemble the ones God gave them.

And no, it’s not an inch to pinch.

Ariana Grande in a strapless light pink lace dress and white heels at the AFI Awards Luncheon.

“Wicked” star Ariana Grande and her co-star Cynthia Erivo have become painfully thin over the last two years.

But now our culture looks sick and generic, like it could use an infusion of Rivers’ candor to diagnose it.

Over the last few years, our usually thin celebrities have been disappearing into weight loss jab (GLP-1) vapors. Actresses like Emma Stone, Ariana Grande and her “Wicked” co-star Cynthia Erivo have become so thin, you could serve soup from their clavicle bones.

Then there’s Demi Moore. Two weeks ago, she attended the Gucci show at Milan Fashion Week, looking more like a praying mantis than a person. At the Actor Awards last week, her tiny frame could barely hold up an elaborate Schiaparelli gown.

Still, Extra TV claimed that she “dazzled.”

Kelly Osbourne and Sharon Osbourne accept the 'Lifetime Achievement' award on behalf of Ozzy Osbourne at The BRIT Awards.

While accepting the Lifetime Achievement award on behalf of Ozzy Osbourne at The BRIT Awards, Kelly Osbourne looked painfully thin. But she and her mother have blasted any comments as body shaming.

Getty Images

That sacred cow was slaughtered as soon as a pharmaceutical cheat code was introduced. It began with larger women like Lizzo, who claimed to have pride in her size until a quicker fix became available to jump-start weight loss.

It trickled into the proudly curvy class, and women like Amy Schumer and Meghan Trainor partook. Even though they built careers by defiantly not conforming to showbiz standards, they gladly took the slimming shot.

So much for authenticity.

Then it hit the thin girls, who seemed to be using it to drop those last pesky five pounds, you know, the ones that kept them from needing a winter coat in July.

Not that this crowd would cop to using it. But how else do we explain this spontaneous shedding of pounds?

While brings us to Osbourne, who sadly lost her father Ozzy in July. And both she and her mother Sharon have hit out at any comments about Kelly’s frail frame. She’s called them “disgusting” and “mean.”

They claim her severe weight loss is due to grief.

This isn’t just grief. This is likely a cluster of emotional issues and medical interventions. And most people are concerned, not just trolls.

But alas, we’ve been conditioned to believe we have to respect people, even when they’ve shrunk beyond a healthy size.

We’re just supposed to act like it’s all normal. And simply be kind. This is just another result of our society’s misplaced compassion.

Instead, come Sunday, many of these women will walk the red carpet, otherwise known as the gauntlet of sycophants. There, they’ll be affirmed and complimented.

And once they pass, people who want to keep their jobs will whisper to each other that something is seriously wrong.

When our dear Joan just would have said it out loud.